WOMANHOOD

WOMANHOOD

Becoming a woman is unsystematic. 

Each and every journey, differs from the last but none more or less divine. At times it can feel awkward, and unpleasant, and painful; and at times it can feel empowering, enlightening, sexy and adventurous; at times it can be all of those things, wrapped up in a terrifying package. Becoming a woman is finding your own womanly charm and what it feels and looks like for you. It’s learning how to feed the energy of that charm and let it shine through you. You will discover what makes you feel beautiful inside and out, and you will find confidence and self-acceptance in areas you never thought you would. It’s a never ending, ever evolving, unpredictable journey. And what-ever that journey looks like for you, just know that you got this honey bun. Keep your pretty head held high, get the fuck up, and take control of your life. And if life is throwing shit at you, it just means you gotta push that little bit harder until it’s known that you will not waver from your place.

Womanhood is the perfect balance of delicate and fierce. It creeps up on you in the night and leaves you staring at the ceiling, or into the night sky, or at a cityscape, asking all kinds of questions.

When I think of womanhood, I think of this divine light that pulsates from your body; and the colour of that light is determined by how you might be feeling at that point in time. Envisioning that light can, in itself, feel so empowering. Because when you can see the light, you can mould it, shift it, dim it and brighten it at your will. That light is fuelled by the way in which you treat yourself. They say that when you take care of your insides, it will show on the outside. So if you’re fuelling that light with positive affirmations of self-love and care not just for yourself but for others, your outer glow will be a reflection of that divine light, brightening inside your core.

Becoming a woman doesn’t have to be overly tricky. Yes, it most definitely has it’s challenges, challenges I am definitely still yet to face as I am only a single step into my own journey of womanhood, but there are outside factors that certainly put a damper on the whole thing. I don’t mean to sound cliché, but the media destroys your first step long before you even get to take it through a motherload of contradictions. You must be skinny, but not too skinny, but you also have to have a big butt, big boobs, a small nose, big lips but not too big. Not too short but not too tall, you have to have a fit body but not too much muscle or else you’ll look too masculine. You have to be modest, but you also have to put out and be sexy, but not too sexy, that will make you a slut. You can’t sleep around, you’ll be called a whore, but if you don’t have sex at all, you’re a prude. Boys want you to stay covered up, but will salivate over girls who choose not to be. It’s not just girls who are force fed these absurd contradictions, it’s the boys as well. Men don’t cry, men aren’t emotional, men should be tall and have a muscular build but not too muscular. There’s this whole idea of how we as men and women should act and yet you can never quite satisfy, because as much as you may try, you can’t be a walking set of contradictions.

When becoming a woman, you start asking yourself what YOU like, what YOU want, and who YOU are. So ask yourself these questions and really think about your answers with no limits, and no outside influence. Think about your answers, and tell everything else to fuck off. You know what you want, you know what you like. Growing up is about exploring all these things. It’s about unapologetically getting to know yourself and what you’re worth. It’s about finding that light inside you and not being afraid to feel sexy, confident, confused, sad, afraid, happy, relaxed, powerful. You’ll figure out what triggers each of these things and that’s something that you will continue to discover the more experiences you have. It’s learning that you can stand on your own two feet and make yourself feel better without the need to rely on anyone else. It’s knowing that you can enjoy and explore your own sexuality. You can experiment, you can make mistakes, you can throw paint at the wall and see what you end up with.

Who says you can’t do these things? We too often limit ourselves and miss out on once in irreplaceable opportunities as a consequence. So next time you have a spark of inspiration, next time you get that urge to do something, (whatever that thing may be so long as you are being kind to yourself and others), and you take a step backwards in fear of judgment or shame or rejection, ask yourself when you asked for anyone’s opinion? Ask yourself why that opinion matters so much to you and realise that any negative judgment cast upon you by anyone is redundant so long as you’re happy within yourself. What’s the point of aiming to impress the people who only want to put you down? They’re not people you would want in your life, so just live for YOU. 

That goes for EVERYONE, no matter who you identify as.

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